Sex:WhatAboutIt.com

 Fidelity?

What Is It And Why Is It Important?

Let me tell you what I know about fidelity in a relationship and then you decide what is best for you and for your relationships.

First, determine if you and your mate understand fidelity, monogamy, and responsibility as an adult and being a member of a household.

Second, decide what is best for you and then your relationship.

If the basics of fidelity and responsibility as an adult is not clear for one of you, then you are just wasting your time in the relationship. Unless that person “gets it” and changes, nothing good will come from the time you spend together.

The times we live in today, considers as part of the dating process. Yet, in times past, people tried to reserve sex for marriage. For whatever reason, some people still believe that sex should be saved until consummated under the marriage covenant.

Your comments are encouraged. Tell us about your story and why you feel you do or do not have a handle on things.

Case Story

Identify problems in the following story and consider the reasons for causing it.

Jasmine’s Story: A thirty year old woman said a good friend told her that she may never find lasting relationships because she is not the type of person men want to marry or to stay with in a long-term relationship.

This woman is a beautiful person, inside and out. Also, she is a good mother and manages money well. This situation brings up a number of questions as to why a man would feel this way about such a wonderful person.

Let us explore some of the reasons men might feel that certain women are not the one they want to settle down with or with whom to spend a lifetime and create a legacy together.

Reasons to consider:

It could be that she is a trophy girlfriend. Why would a trophy girlfriend be a bad thing?

• Often men feel a beautiful women’s fidelity cannot be trusted in a relationship. Men won’t marry women that often get hit-on.
• There are some men may who try to win the affections of a beautiful woman, and yet, once obtained, he becomes bored with her and looks for another conquest. Perhaps a woman is hard to get in the beginning, and so the chase is enjoyable and challenging. However, once snared, he no longer feels satisfied and wants the thrill back that he gets with the chase.

It could be that this woman does not know what she wants. This is true when she feels confused about whether she wants to be a girlfriend and career woman or a wife and mother. She concludes that being a girlfriend is less complicated.

• As a result of this decision, she will not commit to a long-term relationship and will always be looking for reasons to break up.
• She may feel insecure about her relationship. Believing he will be the one to leave first, she will not fully invest in the relationship. It will be fruitless to try because it’s just a matter of time before he goes.
• It could be that sex with her isn’t good any more. For one reason or another, he loses interest in her. Of course, one reason for his loss of interest could be his lack of trust in her fidelity. When trust is an issue, the relationship will suffer in a number of ways. Trust is essential in the fabric of a relationship; without it, we have nothing.Perhaps this woman gives off wrong vibes to other men and appears to be available.
• The most common reason men become dissatisfied with a relationship and leave is because they feel their girlfriend is always looking for a new guy. It’s common for a guy to become jealous in a relationship if he feels she gets into bed with a guy too easily and can’t be trusted.

Perhaps considering your own fidelity to relationships, God, and values that protect peace of mind and happiness will affect you in a positive way and influence those around you as well.

I encourage you to leave me a comment, either positive or to tell me that I’m full of it! I appreciate anything you have to say. We can agree to disagree.

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